Bless This Southern Mess

A dear friend made this adorable mason jar door hanger that is currently residing in my kitchen, but the title of this blog is referring to, umm, me.

As I sat at the kitchen table, stressing over all that I failed to accomplish that day, trying to plan for my daughters 9th birthday party that was in just six days (wow, how time flies!), trying to figure out what to make for a homemade gift at our homeschool co-op Moms Christmas party, as well as penciling down each child’s grade level Christmas party dates and times, I took a long ragged breathe and looked up.

There was my friends’ cutesy door hanger. I couldn’t help but wonder in that moment..”was she thinking about my house, or ME when she made this??” Probably me. Yes, I’m sure of it.

Real talk! Aren’t we all a mess?? I mean, aren’t we? I get serious anxiety when I think about the “perfect moms” out there, with their perfect houses, perfect husbands, and perfect kids! I have the joy of rubbing elbows with many of these perfect moms at our homeschool co-op that we have been part of for nearly 5 years now. However, it’s just in the last six months that I have been making a conscious effort to get to know the other mommas a little better. Let me tell you…we are all a mess in our own messy ways. Every. Single. One. Of. Us.

The ladies in my mind, who I have perceived as “perfect”, would probably laugh until they choked if I ever told them how I had envisioned them in the not so long ago past! But like diving too deep, the realization that these phenomenal females were a whole lot like me in many ways, was the best breath of fresh air!

We are all giving it our best, and that IS good enough! My best advice when you’re feeling like a momster who is falling apart, is to approach one of the women you see as “having it all together”, and ask them simply, “Are you feeling as big of a mess as I am?” I feel confident in saying they will surprise you by not being as perfect as you presumed. You will probably laugh together, cry together, and offer each other great advice!

Sometimes we just need to hear each other’s stories. Remind each other that we all struggle, (homeschool mom or not, this goes for all of us!) and laugh with each other as we swap war stories!

Stay blessed ya’ll, and embrace the mess!


13 thoughts on “Bless This Southern Mess”

  1. Very, very true words. Just because someone looks like they have it together doesn’t mean it’s so. One person’s strength might be another’s biggest weakness. Some are better at cleaning, some are more patient, some are more creative…
    Don’t let the comparison trap get you!

  2. I saw a post from a FB friend just this morning, asking when moms start to feel like they have it all together. The answer is “never.” I stopped short of commenting that, she’ll figure it out someday. There are a lot of young mothers that need to read this, now more than ever with all the picture-perfect photos on Instagram and Facebook, portraying a perfect life and a perfect mother. No one can live up to that.

  3. I really did enjoy your post you are so right. We tend to look at others and see how put together they look and see our selves as a mess. I have 2 children that are 32 and 31 and homeschooled them all through school and graduated them and had hair left when they graduated. That in it’s self was a gift! I homeschooled when homeschooling wasn’t cool and I saw other mom’s that looked so well groomed and had amazing lesson plans to show off on days we met for coffee. ( We were unschoolers, we read for 5 hours a day wrote stories and did saxon math)It made me feel like I was a mess. I sometimes didn’t have time to dress( we had a lot of PJ days for school) or even think of putting on makeup. But when I look back now I wouldn’t change it for the world. I was there I showed up and gave it my best shot, I taught my children how to learn and teach themselves and love learning. They now have successful careers and still to this day love learning new things and both are avid readers. My daughter is a successful author and now writes children’s and young adult books and she will always stop and help a fellow friend with there college homework. I do have to say I am blessed and so glad I homeschooled my children. Things may look a mess but when you are there with your children, helping and teaching them is no better place to be in the world!

    1. I couldn’t agree with you more! I’m sure I look like a hot mess most days, and I am definitely exhausted most of the time, but this adventure we are on is proving to be one of the most rewarding experiences for our family. Thank you for your comment, and I’m so glad you enjoyed the post!

  4. Tthis is such a timely post to read as I head back to work today. So often I feel like my life is on the verge of chaos, and it is so nice to see other women feel the same way.

  5. I am not a mom yet but I also stuggle with trying to be perfect and make my life seem perfect when I am actually on the verge of tears or panic. Such a great and true post! You are so right most of the time the people we see as perfect are just as big of a mess which is great to know.

  6. Embrace the mess…love it! It’s true. As I finished the details on my daughter’s birthday party this past weekend, I thought to myself, why am I doing this so soon after Christmas. “I’m not going to do this to myself next year.” And then I remembered…it’s her BIRTH DAY…I don’t have a choice about when she was born or the time of the year we celebrate it. So, I’ll embrace the craziness of adding one more (albeit very important) activity to our busy holiday schedule. It may be a mess, but it’s a beautiful mess! 🙂

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